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| Hello Xanga,
It is not that I have a lot of free time...but I like to spend time to myself and visit parts of my past. Sometimes I just feel like drawing, but never find the time to. Wouldn't it be nice if I had all the time in the world? But that is just what I have. College is so wonderful and free. I have time to hang out with friends, I have time to myself, I have time to study...yet why can't I seem to sit down and draw? Instead, I have this damn television in my room that I didn't want in the first place. Now I can never leave the room without turning it on and never turn it on without watching it for 3 hours. Television...it's the worst invention yet. Laptops too, just how I am now, typing away while there is still work to be done. I have class in 30 minutes and a concert tonight, but I seem to not care. Have I gotten lazier? I always hate feeling lazy and fat. What have I done today? I would always ask myself. Nothing. I just sat in my room and watched a damn black box for 5 hours straight. I try to spend as little time in the room as possible, possibly for the reason that I hate that demonic black box. Note to self: throw away the television. Note to self: Do what you want to do with your life. I have been telling myself and telling myself, yet just can't find the will to. Time to buckle down.
Thank you.
Until next time Xanga
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| Have you ever noticed something for the first time, and it just so happens that this time it was different?
It makes you wonder about the norm
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| Sometimes, I do not understand people. But, then again, what is there to understand?
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| Today after our Monday night rehearsal, all was dark. All the students had left and went home to sleep. I walked outside to the parking lot, filled with no more than the 5 or 6 orchestra students' cars scattered across the lot. I walked to my car and turned my head casually to check for any night lurkers ready to lunge and hijack my car when I opened the door. Suddenly, I see a white stallion trotting my direction, gleaming under the light of the single lamp post. "What is going on here" I asked myself. I turned to scream at Zac and Ben and Joseph who had also spotted the horse. Then another herd of horses follow, more white and some gray. I am standing in front of my car and six horses come out to trot around the parking lot. How ridiculous is this, how out of place things these horses are. My friends and I chase after the horses, trying to catch one to take home. They avoided us and trotted onto the street where a car stopped and asked us if these horses were ours. I watch as they march off into the distance, seeming to know exactly where to go, galloping so casually that I question myself whether or not these horses do this often. I stand in awe at what just happened. It's not every day you see horses marching in and out of parking lots. This event was so unusual that I felt that I had to record it. We see horses all the time fenced in outside of Plano East, but to see them and be close enough to jump on their backs in the middle of the parking lot at night is really something different and very surrealistic.
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| I am here to document what Senior year has meant for me. I must say that this year has been a highlight in my life thus far, life-changing no doubt. I think I may have started late on college applications. It seems that students are rushed into these things. Nobody has ever explained and walked us through this tedious process in its entirety, so I feel as though Seniors are left to die by the death grip of colleges. We have to go to teachers for recommendations, we have to go to counselors for recommendations, we have to mail in transcripts, we have to take the SATs and the SAT 2s, we have to write essays, we have to fill in fifty questionnaires for each college, and all the while, we still must maintain our grades and worst of all, IB does not loosen its grip on work. Every week, literally, we have quiz, 2 chapters to read, Internal Assessment, quiz, and then test, and then timed writings. Then we also have the 4,000 word essay and 5 commentaries. Shiiit, I just forgot I got another one coming up. Well anyway, the point is, IB and college don't match, not worth it. IB Juniors quit now.
On a brighter side, I am now starting to drive. I have been missing out on the freedom that everybody's been experiencing. My SATs are now over and I feel the whole weight of the world off my shoulders, well some of it. To tell the truth, I kind of liked studying for these, I'll know noSAT, I liked the feeling of owning the test. That does not make me a
nerd! After the first semester, I hope that this last semester of high
school will be coasting. I do not want to worry anymore. I feel like
regaining part of my life back. I want to see my friends more. I want
to dance more. However, in a year, everything might not be the same. It
may change for better, or worse. Leaving for college is kind of like
moving. If I go out of stat one. If I stay in state, I'll see everyone again. Some of that is good, some is bad. I am clueless as to what I should do.
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